How to Deal: Dealing with Students - Lost in Translation - Part 1

Not everything we say is interpreted the same way by every person. The same is true for students. Often, there’s a big gap between what a student believes they are communicating and what the teacher actually “hears.” That gap can be influenced by age, culture, communication style, or neurodiversity.

Students aren’t always trying to be rude, defiant, or disruptive. The key is figuring out where the communication broke down. Let’s look at a few examples.

The “I’m not late!” contingent can run the gamut from an earnest student to one who is absolutely trying to push your buttons, but let’s start with the earnest student.

In this picture, we see a student who may have an ongoing problem with punctuality.

I had a student who was very slow to pack up in her previous class and would barge in with 15 seconds to spare, loudly announcing her arrival. She was in my English as a Second Language newcomers class, and I had been working with her on arriving on time. In her home country, she had still been in elementary school, where students weren’t expected to navigate class changes independently. Students like this can often only work on one issue at a time. First, we focused on getting her there consistently on time. Once that became routine, we worked on less triumphant arrival announcements.

Some students with anxiety make this kind of announcement because the voice in their head has been screaming, You’re going to be late! for the last two minutes. Realizing they actually made it on time can cause the words to come bursting out.

A quick pull-aside and an alternative reinforcer—a fist bump, a teacher smile, a nod—can help the student feel acknowledged without turning the moment into a production.

Of course, some students know exactly what they’re doing. They make the announcement because they can read your body language and know it frustrates you.

That response should be met with absolute flatness—not anger. Ask the student to take their seat and begin without giving the behavior extra oxygen. If it becomes a pattern, that’s the time for a longer conversation about what the student is getting out of the interaction.

This is a common scenario: a student who has just arrived first thing in the morning or returned from lunch suddenly needs to take care of business (bathroom break, getting water, refilling a water bottle) they realistically could have handled on their own time.

There are a number of ways to deal with this issue:

1. The Delay Rule - No student is allowed out until they have been in class for a minimum of 10 minutes and the teacher has finished giving directions.

2. The Time Trade-Off - Time how long the student is gone and let them know that time will need to be made up after school (or whatever consequence makes sense in your setting).

3. The Bathroom Pass Economy - Each student gets one or more bathroom passes for the week, month, or semester. Students who don’t use their passes can turn them in for a small prize.

Paula uses what she calls “rubbish treasure”—random toys her kid no longer plays with. The 8th graders love them, which is both surprising and a little concerning.

4. Weaponized Absurdity (Best for older kids who you have an established connection with and who will get the joke)

For older students, ridiculous suggestions can be weirdly effective.

"This is the third time you’ve asked to go this week. Is there someone you have a crush on? Are you leaving anonymous notes for them near the bathroom? Wouldn’t it be easier to just talk to them? Wait... is it someone I know? Can I guess?"

It’s a little time-consuming, but surprisingly effective. Once the bit is established, you can shorten it dramatically:

"Is this about the anonymous notes again?"